Alright, chicklets and duders. If you aren’t out prowling the LA bar and club scene for sensational singles, you are most likely prowling the interwebs. In the world of online dating you only have a profile and a few pictures to get a first impression from, so how do you know what to say to someone when making the first move to send that handsome HottieWithABody or CutieWithABooty a message?
Here are some simple guidelines.
Keep it classy
If you want someone to regard you seriously as an adult human being you should not only act like one, but also write like one. A message that reads, “I like ur shoes, wanna bone?” most likely will not be responded to. It becomes clear immediately to the reciever of the message that you aren’t looking to date, you are looking for sex, and not only is being vulgar unattractive, sex and dating are two very different beasts. Online dating is for dating, you know, where you get to know someone before slipping them some tongue. There are websites out there for your unsatiated needs, dating websites are not the right place to seek out sexual satisfaction. Clubs, bars, and www.grindr.com, or www.blendr.com are most likely better places for your needs if immediate sex is what you seek. Plus, vulgarity will often convince the adult singles seriously seeking relationships to withdraw from the online dating community. Not cool, sex seekers. Not cool. Use elevated language, spell out full words, do not use text-speak, and be respectful. Nice chicks and dudes dig respectful messages. And who doesn’t want to date someone nice and respectful?
Spice it up with substance
No one likes a boring, generic message that reads like you wrote it, copied it, and pasted it to the twelve dudes whose profile picture involved kittens. Take time to read your person of interest’s profile and make intelligent, delightful remarks on something you found interesting, funny, or profound. If someone mentions they like to travel, ask where their favorite location has been. Attention to detail is sexy. If someone seems to list a particular type of food they totally dig, ask them their favorite local restaurant that serves that type of food. The response you get may just be an invite on a date there! It is ok to ask someone questions about something they have written but don’t make your first message read as a debate, criticism, or a roast. That’s a heavy first impression, not a heady one.
Remember that the glimmering images emanating from your computer screen are actually backed by real humans. Be kind with your words and kindness may be returned. Tone is often hard to interpret via the internet, but if you write honestly from your self you are sure to receive an honest response. Again, be respectful with your words. Treat the first message as an introduction followed by a handshake or a hug. Think before you write and be courteous. This could be the first contact between you and the love of your life!